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I'm a Retired Deaf Activist

I was born to a Deaf person in the middle of a hearing family who does not know sign language and grew up in different ways, neither in the Deaf world nor the hearing world. I studied at a Deaf school using a read-lips method and a mainstream school. So, I'm also a former mainstreamed school alumnus. What was the experience I have become a Deaf person? It was a thrilling journey. Living in an unfriendly country always be challenging. I sometimes was asked why was I born like that and why was I stuck at this family who doesn't know sign language. It felt unfair, though. 

I had been an activist since June 2016 and joined Gerkatin (Gerakan untuk Kesejahteraan Tuli untuk Indonesia) which is a Deaf organization. I worked lots-- such as an interpreter, sign language teacher, public speaker, event committee, coordinator, and lead the group, etc-- and had experienced lots, which downs and ups. It was mixed feelings. Being an activist that what you see it looks fun and cool but either to me and it was really lots of things that I can't say something. I decided to retire as an activist in December 2021. So, why?

I was non-member of Gerkatin and I broke the rules. So, I thought I don't need to be and I want to be an independent person, which I can manage what I do. I resigned and be ready of becoming a Deaf independent. I'm not related with any Deaf organizations and institutions. 

I felt I'm over and I couldn't work like that anymore. I faced politicians, people, communities, lecturers, and another people I've met and argued during my advocacy and campaign. That made I felt tired and always wanted to be done. This was stressful and depression. No one made I feel happy, except I can make Deaf children feel happy of what I give. So, I want to focus my goal and dream, that the only can makes I'm happy with my own life. I don't want to waste my time to serve Deaf people. 

Just want my dream come true first. That's an ultimate goal since when I started off. That's something that I'm going to have to do. I want my dream as I really want to. 

Besides, I felt proud and be grateful became an activist because I had lots of chance to meet the greatest people like I met Deaf British, Americans,  French, and Germans who came to Indonesia. I learned English, International Sign (IS), British Sign Language (BSL), and American Sign Language (ASL). I also met Deaf local greatest people who graduated from foreign universities, like Hong Kong, Australia, United States, and United Kingdom. They made I believe that a native sign language can becomes a successful person and achieve the dream. I was reminded Michael Steven Stein who is a Deaf American lawyer to serve the NAD which is an American Deaf organization in the United States and Nick Palfreyman who is a Deaf sign language linguistic from the United Kingdom has been researched the local sign language in Indonesia since 2007.  They are awesome, smart, and inspiration. They are also polyglot and speak Indonesian and Indonesian Sign Language (BISINDO). So, this is the only part that makes I'm grateful became an activist and lots learned I've gotten. I had coolest chance during my activist career. 

I think I'm over and want to be independently. That's really what I want to do.  But, I never forget my proud community and it will be always. Since I am a Deaf proud and feel reborn to be part of this community, as neither active nor non-active member.  So, I never leave the Deaf community. That's my family.

This is a choice life, I can be happy as soon as possible, whatever happens.  I rely on Him for sure because I can't be alone anymore and would be rely on Him, just give it to Him. He knows what I do and want to do. So, I believe that one.

Thanks, everyone! I love Deaf community. I'm a Deaf proud person and be a native sign language.

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